Traffic Jammy Jam

Oh, it's a TRAFFIC JAM, people.

So earlier this week, we all heard about this ridiculous 60 mile traffic jam in Beijing.

China's massive traffic jam could last for weeks

Chinese Demand for Coal Spurs 9-Day Traffic Jam on Expressway

... and I just couldn't believe it.

HUH? So they're literally STUCK in a sixty-mile traffic jam for nine straight days, not getting out of their cars, just STUCK there?

Or was it possible that it was just referring to nine days straight of commuting that involves a backup that gets as long as sixty miles?

This is why I hate the news. I couldn't figure out this simple answer for the life of me.

So of course, I do what I always do when I want to know things about current events, and that is, get my important information from other people whom I believe will know something.

And for all subjects China-related, or an other eastern Asian country minus the Philippines, I consult with Hawaii Margarette of course. My BFF since grade-school.

Despite the easy-breezy moniker, she is actually a sarcastic potty mouth Jersey Girl just like me, but she was kidnapped from the east coast by marrying into a Hawaiian address. And despite the island-friendly nickname, she is also my personal expert on All Things Related to the People's Republic of China because she is actually Chinese, and her parents have since ditched Jersey to live in Beijing.

Based on those credentials, I'd say she knows things.

So, I called her up at a time that was convenient for me (probably 4AM her time) and I taped the call, and here it is.

Toni Ryan & Hawaii Margarette discuss Beijing Traffic, The Metric System, and Why Chopsticks Are Dangerous To Eat With While Driving
FYI, it's several minutes of snarky cynical banter between two Jersey girls who think they know stuff, so if you're not ready for it, you might want to sample this 90-second confection instead...

See Above (The New York Minute version)