Was listening to the Entertainment Buzz this morning when I heard the devastating news...
TAYLOR SWIFT & JAKE JINGLEHEIMERSCHMIDT ARE OVER!
Give yourself a moment to deal with the news.
OK, so now let's move on in a way fully-approved by Taylor herself: let's write a song about it. After all, we know she will get around to it eventually, but let's help a sista out by trying to write this tune ourselves.
To help our brainstorming, I will throw out a few words & phrases that might come in handy:
FAKE
TAKE
RATTLESNAKE
BRAKE
BREAK (as in "We were on a...")
PIECE OF CAKE
POUND CAKE
BIRTHDAY CAKE
ANGEL FOOD CAKE
COOKIE CAKE
COFFEE CAKE
T-BONE STEAK
SNOWFLAKE
SHAKE
SHAKE (WEIGHT)
PARTAKE
VERONICA LAKE
RICKI LAKE
SALT LAKE (CITY)
EARTHQUAKE
QUAKE (-ER OATS)
BAKE
MAKE
HEADACHE
And of course, how could I forget the most obvious one: MISTAKE.
Forsake!
ReplyDeletethis was your best blog entry. EVER!!
ReplyDeleteand I'm cracking up over Jake's real name, above.
you can also rhyme Gyllenhaal.. mall, ball, fall, wall, haha
ReplyDeleteThanks Teri! Anon, THAT'S BRILLIANT! never thought for a second to use GYLLENHAAL in the song. To use it would be like sticking a musical middle finger up at the culprit, lol.
ReplyDeletein that case, add these to the list:
BRAWL
CRAWL
SKYMALL
WHIFFLEBALL
CRYSTAL BALL
AWFUL (but pronounced AWE FALL)
BATHROOM STALL
FREE-FOR-ALL
INSTALL
COLLECT CALL
EXTRA-SMALL
...
Oh man! I thought you were talking about Jake Ryan.
ReplyDeleteheaven forfend -- JAKE RYAN would never do such a thing.
ReplyDelete