Monday, March 24

Top 12 Resume Disasters

Seriously, people? OK, I know that every person isn't just born to write a stellar resume, but I believe in people, that most people have enough common sense to at least pull together a decent resume.


Am I wrong here? I think I might be giving people in general way too much credit. was kind enough to conduct a survey which yielded the following disturbing results: Top 12 Resume Disasters. Read on.

1. ... mentioned in his resume that he spent summers on his family’s yacht in Grand Cayman.

2. ... attached a letter from his mother.

3. ... used pale blue paper with teddy bears around the border.

4. ... explained a gap in employment by saying he was getting over the death of his cat for three months.

5. ... specified that his availability was limited because Friday, Saturday and Sunday were “drinking time”.

6. ... included a picture of herself in a cheerleading uniform. [Toni Ryan says: "Unless you're the cheerleader of "Save The Cheerleader, Save The World" fame, I'd nix the rah-rah photogs"]

7. ... drew a picture of a car on the outside of the envelope and said it was the hiring manager's gift.

8. ... [listed] hobbies included sitting on a levee at night watching alligators.

9. ... included the fact that her sister once won a strawberry-eating contest.
10. ... explained that they worked well in the nude.

11. ... explained an arrest by stating, “We stole a pig, but it was a really small pig.”

12. ... included a family medical history.

Uber-ridiculous, that's what I gots to say on the matter.

...Says Toni Ryan, recipient of a Creative Arts for Media Award (1992), whose interests include Pilates, Reality TV shows involving former hip-hop stars, & Making gourmet-style Jello Shots for parties & special events.

Anybody hiring???

HEY. P to the S. There is no such section on a Resume for Life History, so leave it out. And (ancillary to previous), multiple pages of a resume are a complete no-no, unless in there you're listing your previous employment involving curing cancer or resolving the National Debt.

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